


Scrubs are really fucking ugly

by princePabloRamirez



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Costume Kink, Crossdressing, Kaashi's only there at the end btw, Kinda, M/M, Sex Fail, Sickfic, Teru is wearing a sexy nurse outfit, Vomiting, cringe characters having fail sex, was going to forget about that!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:21:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25039915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princePabloRamirez/pseuds/princePabloRamirez
Summary: Yuuji has finally been delivered the sexy nurse outfit he ordered a while ago. With Keiji out of the flat to run some errands, the only one he can show it to at the time is Kenjirou.Whatever if he is sick.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Shirabu Kenjirou/Terushima Yuuji, Shirabu Kenjirou/Terushima Yuuji
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Scrubs are really fucking ugly

**Author's Note:**

> TIL that lace jockstraps are a thing. None are featured in this sadly, but I do believe that every man should have one. Just in case.

“Scrubs do not look like that. This is terrible.” 

Kenjirou sniffles and coughs at the same time as he talks, not putting his hands before his face. Even stuck under the cover with a 39°C fever and bones feeling like jello he can still nag like a grandma. Somehow it’s a good thing because Kenjirou only gets real soft and nice when he’s too sick to be unpleasant.

Yuuji keeps on checking himself in the mirror, turning a little around to see his ass. He can look directly at Kenjirou through the mirror, but he’d rather be focused on his nice rear end. “Scrubs are really fucking ugly babe, think of this as the better, updated version!”

To be honest, it’s some cheap sexy nurse uniform bought online and it would look terrible if not for the fact that Yuuji is already pretty damn hot himself. It’s too small for him on purpose, to fit too snuggly and stretch nicely around his curves. There’s no fun in costumes that don’t hug his chest and ass in an impossibly obscene way. The bottom of the dress stops incredibly high, higher than intended, but he’s a whole 1,77m dude in a costume for girls that probably don’t get taller than 1,73m even in heels. If his cock doesn’t spring out the very moment he’s completely hard, he’ll be pretty surprised. Very disappointed too.

He added good fishnets stockings and latex gloves to the uniform just in case and it’s looking perfect, no matter how shitty the whole thing was at the beginning.

When Yuuji finally gets his attention back on Kenjirou, turning away from the mirror, his boyfriend looks at the ceiling with exasperation, his face a pale pink of shame. “Say babe, whaddya think of my new uniform?”

“I already said it sucks.”

He stalks toward him, approaching the head of the bed. It’s hilarious how embarrassed Kenjirou can get when things get him aroused and he doesn’t want to admit it. The best is when Keiji gets him to say or do things he thinks are shameful because he always realizes what he has been “coerced” into once it’s too late to deny anything. Kenjirou plays a dumb game with himself that basically consists of pretending he’s not into a whole lot of kinks and he’s losing considering the fact that the closer Yuuji gets, the more he turns his head the other way. 

“Ooh you’re really red today Shirabu-san, did your fever go up?”

Kenjirou glares at him. “Shut the f-”

“I’m going to take your temperature Shirabu-san so please stay still!”

He straddles him to sit on his pelvis, making really sure to grind against his crotch in the process. He gyrates his hips, makes a little show out of it; he simply cannot overdo it. There’s the comforter between them, but Kenjirou is hissing and gripping his thighs with both hands anyway. Yuuji eventually stops moving, smirking down at his red boyfriend. It definitely doesn’t help that the bottom of the dress is riding up and showing off his lace panties. 

It’s Kenjirou’s favorite pair. He knows because they caught him once jerking off with it and it was so cute and-

“That’s sexual harassment. I’m going to report you to the head of the hospital.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time someone tries to report me... Too bad I’m fucking the director!”

Yuuji puts his hand on his forehead. He has no idea where Keiji put away the thermometer, so that’ll have to do. He’s pretty sure that eating Kenjirou out would be a better way of taking his temperature, but apparently it’s a bad idea using your tongue as a rectal thermometer if someone is sick.

“Yo, you  _ are  _ pretty hot for real!”

“Fuck you.”

“I was getting to that part.”

He should have gotten rid of the comforter before getting on the bed, but Yuuji acts on impulse all the time. It takes a little fumbling around and sitting on Kenjirou’s rib cage, with both thighs around his head and crotch only a few centimeters from his face, but he eventually finds a way to pull the comforter from underneath him. 

Kenjirou is wearing some ugly ass pajama with the symbol of his old high school embroidered on the front. Just seeing it usually throws him into a laughing fit, but he manages to simply giggle; his focus is all on his cock strained against the front of his pants. It looks so sad and neglected, making pretty stains of precum on the fabric. Kenjirou’s dick loves Yuuji just as much as he loves it and it desperately wants his attention. He can grant him that surely. 

He pulls down on his pajama pants and his cock springs free, standing erect. 

“Your cock is so cute Shirabu-san and it’s already sooo hard! I’m going to keep it real nice and warm inside me! Maybe that’ll cure your disease..!”

Kenjirou rolls his eyes and groans, trying to pretend he’s annoyed when he really couldn’t get any redder. They should record him and have everyone look at his blushing face when he starts acting too full of himself.

All that’s left to do is prepping himself. Massaging his hole with the latex gloves feels good, it’s smooth and slippery, but fingering himself with his panties still on turns out to be pretty hard, much more than Yuuji had anticipated. He has to pull aside the lace with one hand and stretch his hole with the other, spread his fingers to try and fit more of them inside himself. He only has his index and middle finger inside himself for now, but there’s not much wiggling to do before he can slip his ring finger in his hole too. That would have been a whole lot quicker if he had some lube with him and not only the residue of what he used to make the latex shine, but he left everything in the living room when he was putting the gloves on. He should have thought about that before sitting on Kenjirou, but it’s too late to take his panties off.

Yuuji longs for lace jockstraps and the ability to think before acting.

“You didn’t think anything through, did you?”

“Dontcha worry babe, I-” He cuts himself for a second, groans while inserting a third finger. It’s a little tight, but it’s good, it’s good. “I got you covered, you’re go-hgn-oing to get your pity fuck.”

“A ‘pity fuck’? You’re the sorry slut hopping on my d-”

“So crude Shirabu-san! All I’m saying is that I’m willing to fuck you one last time before you diiiaaah-!” Yuuji jammed his fingers into his prostate, hard, sending his eyes rolling back. He definitely wasn’t ready for it and keeps on moaning on a high pitched tone when he rubs his sweet spot again.

Kenjirou sits up, struggles a little to do so, but he isn’t paying enough attention to make fun of him. He’ll care about him once he wants his cock. It’s still nice and hard and he hasn’t even touched him yet. It would be hilarious if he was to cum the very moment he penetrates him. Having his dick inside of him instead of his fingers would be so good, so great.

Kenjirou takes hold of the underwear and just, tear it apart. It’s really impressive because, as the ultimate twink he is, he has twig arms, but also those were almost 3 500 yens.

“Baabe! My panties! You can’t do that!”

“You should have thought about that before and took off your stupid underwear.” He coughs, on him, and get rid of his panties by basically throwing them away. “If you want to sexually harass me, get to it already.”

Yuuji laughs, his fingers still in his ass, and he laughs so hard he falls over, hitting the mattress, the edge of the bed dangerously close.

“You’re stupid.” 

He wipes the tears at the corner of his eyes, leaning on his elbows once he’s done cracking up. There’s a pause for a second; he catches his breath with his legs spread just in front of him, dick hard and hole in full view. “Maybe you should take action Shirabu-san and have your way with the nurse if she doesn’t do her job, hmm?”

Kenjirou is looking at his ass, spreading his legs a little more by exerting pressure on his knees. “Should teach you your place.” He’s so cute when he bites his lips, even with a stuffy nose.

“Please do, sir!”

He jerks his dick once or twice, lowering his pants, before getting closer. Yuuji lies down again and holds the back of his knees, spreading his thighs, giving him all access to his ass so he can guide himself inside him. Kenjirou goes slow, too slow, and it’s nice, yeah, because his hole could have used a little extra fingering before getting to the penetration, but it’s also very annoying. This is some anticlimactic bullshit.

“Keep on fucking me like that babe and I’ll fall asleep anytime-” Yuuji has barely ended his sentence that Kenjirou manages to gather all of his strength to ram what's left of his length inside him, making him mewl loudly.

Yuuji giggles through the moans, guys that fall for anything are the best. Kenjirou is grabbing onto his hips to draw his cock out and right back in, going back and forth. It’s a little messy, could go a little harder and faster, but Yuuji can forgive him, apparently moving a little too fast make his head hurt. He’s not the most powerful guy to begin with and he doesn’t expect much from someone who has to slow down to sneeze.

Kenjirou isn’t really hot or sexy, he’s cute like a bunny rabbit, or a chinchilla, or a groundhog. He’s sweating and groaning, and Yuuji wants to kiss him, kinda. The impulse to lick the sweat running down his temples is stronger, but he’s out of reach. 

There’s rummage in another part of the flat, the heavy sound of the front door closing. Kenjirou stops moving altogether to straighten up, looking at the hallway, and Yuuji can’t see anything. There’s no use to still be holding his legs up if he’s going to get distracted at the first thing happening. 

“Was it busy?” Kenjirou can’t even say welcome back, straight to the point.

“No, but I stopped by the convenience store to get some extra groceries. How do you feel ?”

“ _ I _ am doing really great Keiji since you came back, thanks for asking, I was missing you like crazy!” Kenjirou glares at him, an annoyed scowl on his face.

Keiji, on the other hand, appearing through the door with his fabric bag, really doesn’t look all that bothered. He doesn’t kiss Kenjirou, but he has a hand stroking his head softly when he leans in to kiss Yuuji. It’s quick, and nice, and Keiji should use more chapstick.

He puts down the bag on the bed and it’s full of medicine in carton boxes.

“Have you been able to rest a little?”

“No, not really.” He glares at him again when he talks, as if he wasn’t still balls deep in his ass.

“To my defense, he was really into it a couple of seconds ago.”

It makes Keiji snorts.

“I’m going to put away the groceries and cook dinner, you’ll let Kenjirou rest once he comes.” His tone of voice doesn’t make it sound like an order, but it’s one nonetheless. Yuuji pouts a little, disappointed, and Keiji caresses his face. “You’re very pretty, the nurse outfit does suit you well.”

Ooh yeah, bent over the kotatsu to be fucked by the director of the hospital because he was harassing patients again. Good, that’s a good idea. Because knowing Kenjirou, he won’t put too much effort into making sure that he can come too.

“Babe we can-... Are you okay?” 

Kenjirou is breathing weirdly, through the mouth and very loudly, as if he was trying to catch his breath. His eyes are shiny and suddenly he wants to get up, which, in their position, isn’t exactly the easiest thing to do. Especially for someone who’s sick and has his pants lowered to his knees.

They’re still passively looking at him, not too sure what he’s trying to do, when Kenjirou starts puking, like a stupid dog, right in front of him and not on the floor.

“Kenjii!” It’s too late to stop him anyway, it’s all over him and the bed. Yuuji loves getting puked on, really, even more when he’s wearing a costume he was delivered a few hours ago. He could find it cute if he was drunk, but again, he is completely sober and wearing a brand new outfit he bought with his very own money. The fact that it was only 1 100 yen on Taobao isn’t comforting at all. So Yuuji stays here, not moving, with puke smelling like the smelts they had for lunch all over him. There’s puke on his skin too, and even if it wasn’t the case, the fabric is so thin and form-fitting, it would be exactly the same. 

And Kenjirou has the audacity to look all teary-eyed when he stops puking, with puke snot running down his nose.

Keiji just seems tired. He’s probably already listing in his head the cleaning he’s going to have to do. Stripping the bed, bringing the comforter to the dry-cleaner, washing what he can himself. 

“Take off your clothes, the two of you.”

Yuuji really hopes he bought suppositories.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this during a game with friends: we choose a theme and write porn about it. The theme this time was uniform. Friend said that he really felt the love between the characters and idk how real the love is from anyone else's perspective, but damn...... 😢  
> I also have tumblr!!!✨ https://nykrkoupalki.tumblr.com/


End file.
